dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
