I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
