Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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