oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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