So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
