you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
only if we run a train.
done.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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