Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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