I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
