omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize