Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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