Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
