I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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