I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize