How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize