I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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