i dont even know how to be here
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
