weddingsv make me drug and hornr
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
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He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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