I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
