I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
