If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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