we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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