she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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