We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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