It's like God shit irony all over that family
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Semen is not good for contacts.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize