At least make sure they are 18
Why
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
