yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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