I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
