You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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