I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
