did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
