He is an equal opportunity slut.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Randomize
