your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I said "one day" and that day is not today
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
