I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
