We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
