dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
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Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
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You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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