I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
