How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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