Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize