if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
