No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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