How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
they need to just BURY HIM!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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