i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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