During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize