Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
