I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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