Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
