the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
