i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
