if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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