have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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