I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I use my feet as sexual weapons
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
