Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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