i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
